Children's Book

Hello. Good morning.

In the past, I've had a few very kind and generous folks tell me I should write and illustrate a children's book. That absolutely made my day. It really meant a lot. And I got to thinking, "How much fun would it be to write a children's book!" I began thinking of the setting, characters, plot lines, twists...this book was going to be epic. It would span centuries...telling tales of fantastic heroes and wondrous villains. There would, of course, be flying unicorns (I never understood why nobody combined a pegasus and unicorn...that's just common sense), talking sharks, and self-depricating robots. Then I realized I needed to stop right there. I was getting carried away. I could never write a children's book. Not even a short story. Not even a haiku.

Hey kid, you're sticky.

Feed yourself much? Prob'ly not.

Blegh. Ick. Don't touch me.

See?

In high school, we were in a homeschool creative writing class. We were asked to write a short story about whatever we wanted. It had to fit on one page. Everybody else wrote stories about a kid learning to ride a bike, or a family shipwrecked, or a hiker traversing the wiles of Mount Everest. I wrote a story about a cheetah hunting, chasing, killing, and eating a wildebeest...from the perspective of the cheetah. I can't write a children's book.

Kids are odd. I don't know how to relate to them. What do they like? What are they thinking? What do they want from me? I think they're smarter than they let on and that scares the beejeebles out of me. I don't know what's going on inside their mind. Besides, I don't have the literary and grammatical training to write a book. I say things like "y'all's" and "bejeebles". Those aren't even real words. Your kids would never get into college if they read that book.

However, just to see if I could do it, I tried writing a children's short story once...complete with illustrations. I'd like to share it with you.

It's called...What Happens When You Don't Eat Your Veggies.

What do you think? I've got the manuscript out to a few publishers. I'm expecting a call back any day now. Any day now.......

Dream Job: Costume Designer

So...here I am continuing the Dream Job illustrations...FROM A YEAR AGO. How horrible of a blogger am I.

This dream job is from Katy. Katy just had a baby! His name is Robert. They call him Robby...I call him Robberz. That's his DJ name. He's also known as The Lion. And he is ADORBS.

Katy says, "I'd want to be a costume designer/seamstress for a theatre."

That's so awesome, cuz I want to do hair and make-up for a theatre or movies! We should start a company...we could call it Sew Hairy.

No. We should never call it that.

Katy, here is your dream job...

Just so you know...David walks in and hears me snickering, sees what I'm drawing and says, "And HOW old are you?"

Old enough to draw a cartoon heiny, thank you very much.

Pix from the Weekend

Soooo sleepy.....

What's that hootin' and hollerin'...?

I know that sound!

Is it...??

It's Papaw!!! Whoa...he's a little scary up close.

But we love Papaw!

Help.

Storytime with Mamaw.

Pips, Harps, Papaw, and Julia Roberts

Reading in my Bubble Land O' Happy

Distraught by the tragedy of their great-grandfather being swallowed whole by Inflatazilla, our heroic twins attempt to rescue their beloved relative before the monster's gastric juices digest him completely.

It spit me back out, Papaw, hang in there! We're coming!

A quick hug and then it's back at the task at hand.

Their endeavor failed, Piper Lee throws her head back in dismay and cries out towards the heavens, "Whhyyyyy?! Why did Inflatazilla come here?? Why did it choose Earth? Banish it back to the merciless planet from whence it came!" Sorry, we've been watching Falling Skies.

10-niner...Uh, Curls Magoo, this is Upchuck Wagon, on the road to Houston. A friendly hello, we'll see you on the road, pardner. 10-4 out.

Roger that, Upchuck! Curls Magoo out.

Kithy Kithy!

Gray Cat looks sleepy.

Psst...Gray Cat, wake up.

Uh...Gray Cat?

Gray Cat's only line of defense against the overwhelming love of the twins...playing dead.

FREEDOOOOOOM!

Jewelry dress up with Miz Di.

Hmm...hey, lady...looks like you got some more sparkly stuff on you. Don't be holding back on us, now.

Oh, this necklace is definitely me.

Girlfriend, don't you take my necklace.

Singing "Mairze Doats" with Miz Di, the same song she sang with us when we were wee little ones.

I have some videos of the girls over at Mamaw and Papaw A's, but I haven't loaded them yet. Papaw, I heard about the goldfish crackers...uh huh. :)

On Saturday, we got to see little Liam for the first time. Rebecca flew down from Ohio for a couple of weeks. Leems was born in February. Oh my word, look at that face. Such a charmer. And Liam's pretty cute, too.

Monday Update

I have toooons of pictures from this past week and I'll post them soon! But here's an update on things in general.

We found out our neighbors got divorced. Super sad to hear that. Apparently, it was a very mutual decision and the ex-wife "couldn't be happier." She had been living in a rented house in another town with the kids while he was living here...that's why we never saw her anymore. Now, he's moved out (hence the moving stuff in and moving stuff out all in one day) and she moved back in with the kids. But, he still comes over to mow her yard...huh. And Rocky, their stupid shitzu, is unfortunately still alive and unfortunately still pooping in our yard, despite the fence. Unfortunately for him, I've hired a band of mercenary strays...your days are numbered, Rocky.

My kids ate a stack of flash cards.

We got to meet our nephew, Liam, for the first time and can I just say how stinking cute he is. I'm totally his favorite...you can already tell.

I have discovered the magic of tabata training and I have downloaded an app to help me in my endeavors.

The colored streaks I put in my hair...gone. That lasted about 24 hours.

Oh gosh, I need to feed the kids. I'll post pictures later!