Rice Cereal = Delicious

That is a lie.

Rice cereal does not equal delicious. In fact, it equals the opposite. Believe me, I tasted it. BUT, babies seem to like it, so...what can you do...

Last Tuesday, we took the gremlins to see Dr. Reminds...who, I am getting a little closer to figuring out who he reminds me of...right now, I'm going with Daniel Farraday/Widmore from LOST. Still not quite there, but that's as close as I've gotten so far. Anyways. They weighed and measured them and gave us their percentages.

Harper:

Weight - 15 lbs. 3.5 oz. - 80th %

Length - 24" - 50th %

Head - 16.5" - 80th %

Piper Lee:

Weight - 14 lbs. 8 oz. - 70th %

Length - 24.5" - 60th %

Head - 16.75" - 90th %

The only measurement they're average in is their length. Other than that, they're THE WORLD'S MOST GIANT BABIES. Not really. But, look at their heads! I told you they had big noggins. And, you have to take into consideration that they were born a month early. Dr. Reminds was super happy they were growing so much. He said it normally takes a year for premature babies to catch up to their full-term buddies. And the girls have caught up with and passed that. Which is insane, because as I've said before, David and I are both Hobbits, so I don't know where they get the size from. Although, David has an uncle who is really tall. And three of my uncles are really tall. And my great-grandmother was like 6 ft tall and my cousin Sam is 7 ft fall and Noah is like a circus freak, so...who knows.

But either way, they're doing great. They had to get their 4-month shots. :( But I did better this time and stayed in the room. I hunched in a chair in the corner and squeezed my eyes shut and covered my ears, but at least I stayed in the room. And as soon as Nurse Evil Needles finished torturing my sweet angels, I ran over and scooped them up and kissed their precious bald heads and said, "Mommy's here...Mommy will never hurt you..." as we all three simultaneously scowled at Nurse Evil Needles while she nervously hurried out the door.

Dr. Reminds said we could start them on solids if we wanted to...maybe try rice cereal first. I'm a little hesitant about the rice cereal because I heard it causes constipation. Is it bad? I was thinking of maybe waiting until they were 5 months and then just giving it to them once a day. Because, they sleep 11 hours at night...well, they sleep about 10 and then they're awake and playing for the last hour. So, I didn't see a need to give it to them at bedtime. I thought about in the morning, followed by a bottle. Is that what you do? Any advice in this area would be much appreciated. Shane, I know you have plenty of helpful hints. So, thanks in advance. And then later, we'd throw in the orange veggies and fruits. He said as long as I started them on solids before they were 6 months, they'd be fine. Apparently, if you wait until after 6 months, it's harder for them to learn to eat with a spoon. Weird, huh. Didn't know that. Sara, is that what happened to you?

This past Saturday, David and I decided to venture out for the first time ever by ourselves with the girls. We've gone other places by ourselves with the girls, but the destination always had people that could help us. Saturday's destination was the mall. Woo hooooo! The girls' first shopping trip. We took pictures to document this occasion.

And being the Daddy's girls that they are, David gave them each some spending money. But they were so sweet and gave it back to me so I could buy Uncle Noah's graduation present.

How about Piper Lee would NOT give her dollar back. I'm like, "Hey, kiddo. It was for the picture only. You're not old enough to make reasonable decisions when to comes to making purchases. Fork it over." I had to pry it out of her slobbery little hand. Death grip. And please excuse my mad scientist expression.

We had such a good time. I was amazed by how many people stopped to ask questions. In our multiples birthing class, the instructor told us we'd get asked a lot of the same questions and we did! Are they twins? Why are there two? Are they sisters? Are they the same age? Are they identical? Did you have both of these at the same time? Most of the time, people just stopped the stroller...like, mid-stroll...and looked and said, "Aww...two." Not many people actually said the word "twins." Which made me laugh. It was always "two." The lady at the Clinique counter in Macy's, her name was Kathy, made me promise to bring by them again so she "could watch them grow up." A little creepy...but sweet. The girls did great and stayed awake pretty much the whole time. My little shoppers. I can't wait to take them big girl shopping one day. Mom used to do that except Sara and I hated it (I think most kids go through an I HATE SHOPPING! phase), so she would bribe us with a Hello Kitty surprise...shopping then became a lot more fun. And now it's one of my faves.

So, back to the rice cereal...Sunday afternoon, we decided to see how the girls liked rice cereal...just to see. They semi-liked it. They were more hmmm, this is interesting than I HAVE TO HAVE IT ALL IMMEDIATELY. They kept leaning forward in their Bumbos. They usually sit straight up in them, so I don't know if their bibs were too heavy...not...or if they were just particularly wobbly that day. Either way, it was more funny than an actual feeding session. Harper was getting the hang of it and they were kind of hungry, so we ended up stopping and just feeding them their bottles. David likened the situation to Beast learning to eat with a spoon on Beauty & the Beast.

Did I already tell y'all they're roll-over champs? Harper rolled over at 3 months and Piper Lee rolled over a little less than two weeks later. I was so proud! And then we kept putting them on their tummies to watch them do it again and again...they don't like that. And now, they're THISCLOSE to rolling over the other way...back to tummy. They can get up on their side...they'll literally be at a 45º angle to the floor and then use the energy to swing back over onto their back like "Oh gosh...I was too tired to just go that extra inch." Geez.

THAT time...

For almost a year, I've been able to avoid "that" time...of the month. But now it's back. And I hate it. And it's not even "that" part...it's the moodiness that I'm talking about. And it's not fair. I honestly firmly without a doubt believe that all women should have a week off each month to deal with it and recuperate. Men don't understand. I don't want to hear how men are the ones that have to "deal" with it because you have to "deal" with us going through it. You have no idea how much energy we exert just to keep ourselves from ripping your limbs off on a daily basis. I know that God gave us "that" time because we are the only ones strong enough to handle it. Men would crumble upon themselves.

WOW. I sound super moody, huh. RAAAAARGGGHHHH!

Poor David...he's so great about the whole thing. Totally patient and sweet and kind and caring. And pretty cool about the fact that I lugged his cell phone at his head when the stupid thing went off at 5 in the morning. And really amazing about the fact that I kicked him in the face when he set his pair of socks down on top of the bed near my feet and woke me up...again. He's so great. I couldn't ask for a more amazing husband.

Which is why I feel bad about the fact that this happens to him every night when he comes home...

And it's not HIM. He just happens to be the only adult I see during the day, so he gets the brunt of my emotional wreckedness.

The mailman also gets a little bit of it.

Sometimes I feel like the only person who understands me is Blue the Cat.

By the Seashore...

(iPhone photos are mine [the crappy, dark ones]...Hipsta prints are Cara's...the rest are Tris')

I'm so mad. I'm mad because I'm not at the beach. If someone told me that I could live on the beach forever, but never have chocolate again...I'd seriously consider it. That's how much I love the beach. I probably would say no, though. That's how much I love chocolate.

But still, I heart the beach. And it's always no fun to leave it. But this past Thursday after work, Cara, Brandi, Tris and I headed south for a long weekend at le beach. So. Much. Fun.

We started off the trip by looking at my fabulous homemade flippy flops.

All day Friday, we baked in the warm, golden rays. Sigh. So relaxing. I think I was using Coppertone from 1893 because #1, it smelled a little weird when I was putting it on and #2, the only places I got burnt were the places I slathered on the most lotion...the tops of my feet and the tops of my shoulders. Weird. Oh well. We walked a mile and a half to the most fabulous little seaside town and ate lunch. This was an adventure because, as you well know, walking in sand or water doubles your exertion level...so, technically we walked 3 miles there and 3 miles back. It was also an adventure because the purple flags were up...which means that marine life was abundant that day. Apparently, the little blue fringy jellyfish and some Portuguese Man of Wars wanted a tan, too, so they were littered across the shoreline. It was like a mine field. But still, the water was as crystal clear as the Caribbean and the sand was soft, sugary and white. Perfection.

We ate lunch at the taco bar. Delish.

And then walked back to the beach.

Every morning we ate breakfast at the best little coffeehouse eva. Is coffeehouse one word or two? Coffee house?

One night, we ate supper in paradise in a little beach town that smelled like rosemary everywhere you went. My crab-stuffed shkrimp wrapped in pancetta (pahn-CHATE-uh as Giada would say) was amazing.

There were two weddings going on. We wanted to crash, but it was starting to sprinkle a little bit, so we forgoed. Forwent? Decided to forgo the crashing.

Another night, we ate at this bar restaurant that was really red inside. It was like a dark room, but awesomer...and with delicious food. I got the crab cakes. As always.

Naked mermaid.

On Saturday, we went shopping. All day. It's like I told the gals. The beach makes me so happy. And shopping at the beach makes me that much happier.

Actually, no, I spent it on makeup. I don't wear shoes in the summer.

Things I learned this weekend:

The sound of my external hard drives, Bogue and Weejer, whirring to life after a long weekend's sleep does not equal the sound of the waves crashing on the pure white shore while gulls screech overhead.

Cocoa Crispies does not equal a fresh cranberry orange scone and Mango Ceylon tea.

A wet, 54º overcast Tuesday does not equal perfect 84º weather and sunshine. Where did this dumb cold front come from?

Waking up does not equal sleeping late.

Spraying off the patio as you watch the deluge of pollen-infused water flow into the yard does not equal shopping.

But the main thing I learned is that no time ever spent at the beach will ever equal time with my sweet, amazing, perfect husband and my precious, wonderful, perfect daughters. I missed them SOOOO much. I probably called 15 times a day checking on everybody. It was definitely a nice, relaxing, and refreshing weekend, but I was very happy to hug all of them and give them endless kisses. I cannot wait to take the gals to the beach! Technically, they've already been twice...they just couldn't get out. I definitely needed the break and I am so grateful to Mom and David for giving it to me. And I'm so grateful to Tris, Cara and Brandi for such a fun time. You gals are fabulous. And Shane, tell your grandmother "thank you" for letting us use their condo! Super adorable!

Oh, also...everyone...you need to get Cara to do her Jamie Oliver Food Revolution impersonation for you. You will not regret it. You will pee your pants. Make sure she says "square pizza". I'm going to video her one day so those of you who don't have regular visits with Cara can see it. Square pizza...ahhhhhhhhhhhh...haha. Awesome.

Beach Bound!

OOOOh my goodness, it's been eons since I've written a real post. I don't know why. All I do is lay around all day and do nothing. Ha.

So, I figured I'd catch you up on what's been going on lately.

Out of nowhere, and I mean nowhere, the girls started sleeping 8-9 hours at night. They did this for about two weeks. Then, out of NOwhere nowhere, they started sleeping 10 hours. Then, out of NOWHERE, they started sleeping 10 hours and 45 minutes. And that's about where we're at now. We had been holding them off until about 8-8:30 at night, but they were having none of that. So, we started feeding them around 7-7:30 and they are OUT. And they sleep until 5-5:45 a.m. (Light from heaven shining down, angels singing...HALLELUJAH!) And by "out", I mean, they drink their entire bottles and we set them in their crib and they either are #1, already asleep or #2, awake and go to sleep on their own within 10-15 minutes. I couldn't ask for more perfect little sweeties. They are wonderful.

So, David and I feed them about 7 p.m. and we have the rest of the night to ourselves. It is fabulous. We'll eat supper together. We'll watch a House episode together. We'll play a game together. We'll take our showers. Ha, you thought I was gonna say "together" didn't you? You creepy perv. But, you'd be correct. Mreoow. Anyways. We usually go to bed at 9:30 p.m....because we're 85 years old. Actually, it's because we're exhausted. But I'm not complaining. We get up at 5:30-5:45 and feed those little monsters. David goes in to work. I do the laundry, clean house, pay bills, and start work at 7:30 a.m. The girls are usually wide awake and are SUPER VOCAL during this time. You saw the videos. It makes me laugh so hard. When they get grouchy vocal, I relocate them to the living room floor under their play mats or just on a palette and they watch TV. I can only listen to Baby Einstein/Mozart for so long, so eventually, they watch HGTV or Food Network. They love it. Which makes me so proud. My little home decorating foodies. They've recently developed this condition in which they fall asleep whilst playing or watching TV. All on their own. I'm in the zone, designing whatever, and I realize...it's quiet. A little TOO quiet. And I'll get up and peek around the corner and sho nuff, them babies be passed out. Three to four hours later, I feed them again. That's really the toughest part of my day. Every now and then, one will still be asleep or perfectly content playing and I'll grab the fussy one and feed them separately. But usually, they get hungry at the same time. It's like a timer goes off and only they can hear it. And by golly, if I don't fix their meal RIGHT THEN...it's...well, it's not good. The twins grow razor sharp fangs and their eyes glow red and burn lasers into my soul and they jump on my neck and bite me. It's pretty scary. So, we have these chairs we got as a gift and I prop both of them up and I've got two hands, two babies, and two bottles...and we all just sit there. They eat. I wait. Sometimes it gets pretty hectic...pretty messy, but so far, we've all survived.

They really are the sweetest little babies. They play so well and sleep so well. I get my work done. I keep the house clean. I get to spend a few hours at night alone with Davey. I couldn't be happier.

Easter Sunday was the first time we've taken them to church. Anybody with kids knows how hard it is to take a kid, much less a baby, to church. It takes us about 2.5 hours to prepare to go to the pediatrician. I'm leery about nurseries. Ahh..I promise I'm not one of "those" people. I can't keep my kid away from germs forever. I know that. But given the fact that I've been told by doctors, nurses, friends, strangers, dogs that a church nursery is the most germ-infested place a baby can go, I'm kind of hesitant about it. I know they'll get sick at some point...I realize that. I'm not oblivious to it. However, at this point in our lives, it would be insane to have a sick baby...much less two at the same time. I mean, I would TOTALLY "deal with it" if one of them was sick...of course...but I'm saying, if I can avoid it, at least for now, I'm going to. As long as I can. And also, because it takes FOREVER to get them ready to go anywhere. You have to literally pack an entire store if you take your kids anywhere. Anyways. They were SO great in church. I was really nervous because my tiny little girls...well, they don't make tiny little girl noises. And I just KNEW that one of them was going to let something loose right in the middle of the pastor's sermon. You can't really call them burps and toots. They're the kind of noises that would put a grown man to shame. But thankfully, Harper timed hers perfectly right as we were singing a song, so it worked out.

We do Tummy Time (I hate saying that, but what else are you gonna call it...Belly Hour. Ab Activities. Gut Meditation) with the girls every day. And at 14 weeks, when we were at my parent's house, little Harper Mo rolled over! It surprised her as much as it did us. She's a rolling over fool now. Then, this past Monday, little Pipsqueak rolled over! Remember the whole mirror image twin theory...well, Harps rolls to her left and Pipes rolls to her right. I'm so proud of them. I guess they hated Tummy Ti-gag so much, they decided they'd better figure out a way to get out of it and fast.

We met up with Zack and Malinda on Sunday for the girls' first picnic. They seemed to enjoy it...considering they slept almost the whole time. And yes, those hats are toddler sun hats. My gals got some big ole heads. It's where they store their super smartness and ultra cuteness.

Judging by what my back tells me, I'm guessing the girls weigh about 37 pounds each now. We'll find out on Tuesday at their 4 month check-up.

Mom came up yesterday to stay with us the rest of the week and help me get the girls to their appointment on Tuesday. And we took the girls out in the stroller for a walk on the new trails. And they LOVED. IT. They usually hate it, so I don't know what made them change their minds. We walked for an hour. Now, I can normally walk for days. I love to go for walks. But Mom walks differently than me. And when I say "walk", I mean Mom walks at a normal pace for cardio and I scrounge up whatever energy and speed my legs can muster and try my best to keep up. Mom's inseam is 101". My inseam is 18.5". So, I burned like 1,029 calories trying to stay with her...while pushing two half ton babies. And she's like a drill sergeant..."Ruth! Faster! Come on, pokie! I've got snails sticking to me...even they can keep up with me." One of these days, I'm going to trip her. And look down at her and laugh. Mwaah ha haaa. When I got out of bed this morning, my legs gave way and I pooled into a puddle of jelly on the floor. That's when you know you got some good exercise.

So, gift of gifts...sweet Mom came up this week, like I said...just so I could leave tonight to go to the beach for the weekend with my gal pals. Oh sweet beach. Three whole mornings of sleeping until whenever I want. That's pretty much all I'm gonna do...sleep. I'll definitely miss the girls and David, but oh my gosh, I have been looking forward to this for four months. You don't really realize how much you need a break mentally. This will be the first time I've been away from them for more than 4 hours and you know what, I'm okay with it. :) It's going to be great. So, Mumsy and Davs and the twins. I know they'll do fabulous!

Alrighty, I gotta go pack...cuz I'z goin to tha beach!

Monster Babies 2

Monster Babies

Out of nowhere, they started doing this...

Question

How do you measure a baby's age?

With numbers, dummy.

Gyah, that's not what I mean. I mean, do you use weeks or months? And how long do you count by weeks or months before you start saying, "Oh, she's two years old." (I know a gal that has a 3- year old and she still measures by months...her "39-month old daughter loves daycare.") Anyways. Because, when you're pregnant, you count by weeks or you give a general estimate in months to random strangers. And with newborns, I guess most people count with weeks. But when do you stop doing that? And also...is it a new month when they reach another 4 weeks or do you measure a new month when it gets to that month's day on which the baby was born? Does that make any sense?

For example, this coming Wednesday, the girls will be 16 weeks. Does that mean on Wednesday, they will be 4 months old or do I wait until April 30 (they were born on December 30) to count them as 4 months old?

There's no reason I'm asking this information, just curious. Because it's annoying me and I want to know. Thanks, buddies!

Have a marvelous weekend! Marvelous. " 'Cause I'm the magnificent, marvelous, mad Madam Mim!" What's that from? NO GOOGLING!