Sunday, February 6, 2011

Le Trip

As you know, I was in Virginia most of last week working on a campaign, new logo, and new website for my buddies up there. We got so much done, which is awesome, but I am GIVE. OUT.

I'll start at the beginning...

Tuesday afternoon, I went by el hospital to see Brandi, Shane, and brand new little Finn! OHMYGOSHYOUGUYSHEISSOSTINKINGADORABLE. He is the spitting image of Shane, but has Brandi's sweet personality and intelligence. PRAISE GOD. (I kid, I kid, Shaney Pooh.) No, but seriously, he is a doll. He weighed 7 pounds 10 ounces (I think) and just seeing him all snuggled in Brandi's arms when I walked in made me well up and kind of think..."Awww...that was so much fun." But no worries, no more kiddos for awhile...A. WHILE. But by golly, there's nothing else sweeter in this world. He weighed 10 ounces more than Harper and he was SO tiny. I don't ever remember the girls being that small. I just wanted to kiss all over his face, but I restrained myself. He has a headful of thick, black hair and he raises one eyebrow and gives you a once-over every 10 minutes or so. Uh...melt. After an hour with the family (ran into big sisters Sasha and Marina and Aunt Senia on the way out), I headed to the airport.

I don't know why, but they ALWAYS pick my hands to swab. I don't look trrsty, do I? I took out the vowels in case "they" were watching. Of course, I passed, as always and I made my way to the gate to wait. 99% of passengers at airports are businessfolk making their way to or from a business meeting. I was sitting in the midst of about 1,039 of them...all on their cell phones or bluetooths...all talking loud enough for me to basically understand the inner-workings and deepest darkest secrets of their companies. I even got a few passwords.

There was one girl that didn't appear to be traveling for business. I couldn't figure her out, though. She was really supermodel pretty...and was dressed the way I want to dress, but don't have the nerve to. She had a black portfolio, about the size of my design portfolio from college and a leather satchel. In the seat beside her was a very fashionable AKC traveling case, complete with some sort of dog. It was a cross between an Ewok and a Tribble. An older businessman approached her and asked a random question about the critter, which led her to saying this was the first time she had ever been in an airport and she didn't know what to do. In my boredom, I decided she was a socialite whose parents decided to cut her off and not allow her to use the private jet anymore. So, she and Versace (the dog) were running away to NYC because she was going to be a fashion designer...hence, the portfolio.

I absolutely love to fly. My favorite part is taking off. But, I gotta admit...I'm always a little afraid right when the front wheels lift off and the nose tilts up towards the sky that the tail end is going to scrape along the runway. I know it's not, but it feels that way and I always cringe a little bit and then say a prayer of thanks when the back wheels lift off, leaving the tail (and my tail) intact.

Wednesday through Friday, we worked worked worked. It's really weird because I "see" these same fabulous folks every day during the work week. We email all the time. But, I see them in person maybe once a year. It's funny how technology has connected us the past few decades. But, even though I talk to them on a regular basis, it's very nice indeedy deed to hug their necks and eat lunch with them and see their sweet smiles in person. I wish I had had more time to spend with them, but Justin was like WEBSITE! LOGO! COUGH DROPS! (I'm kidding. It's always fun to pick on someone who doesn't read the blog...and y'all better not tell him I said that. You, too, BJ.) No, actually, Justin is a great boss and he kept us on track and we got everything, plus some, done. It was a very productive week! I'm super proud of everything we accomplished.

I had a great time with you guys...I really did! Next time, we'll plan it around a weekend and we'll all go bowling or something. Hugs to you all!

So, you know my fascination and deep love for hotels. I love staying in hotels. And this particular hotel always has freshly baked cookies waiting for you at night when you come "home." I have been looking forward to these cookies for a month. I arrive around 10:30 the first night and I didn't see any cookies. I assumed maybe there was a cut-off time. Whatevs. The next night, I see a little tupperware container on the front desk counter with some tongs nearby. It was the cookies, although not in their usually clear plastic display shelf thing. Fine, whatever, as long as there were cookies. I grabbed a chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin. I went upstairs. I ate my two cookies. I went back downstairs, grabbed two more, and scrammed back upstairs before anybody saw me. The next night...NO COOKIES. But, it was late, so I just growled in the general direction of the desk and stomped up to my room. The next night...NO COOKIES AGAIN!! That was it. I ding dinged the little, silver bell and waited...drumming my fingers on the granite countertop. The sweet receptionist came out from the office and I said, as syrupy sweet as I could, "Are you guys gonna have cookies tonight?" She smiled and said, "We sure are." She pulled that stupid tupperware container out from BEHIND the desk and set out the tongs and napkins. Then, she had the audacity to say, "When I checked in for work, I was so happy to see there was a full batch of cookies already made. These are the best cookies." I agreed wholeheartedly and cried a little as she opened the container to a heaping pile of chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin delicacies from heaven. I figured she'd set the container on the counter and then leave while I dug in, but no...she WATCHED ME get my cookies. I meekly grabbed two...a measly two...and put the tongs back in the basket. She put the lid back on and set the goodies back behind the counter. I pouted and went to my room, ate my cookies, and pouted some more. Why bake a huge batch of cookies for the guests and then hide them so nobody knows they're there? Who does that?! Whatever. I'm over it.

(Random picture time)
I brought my super cozy jacket and got to wear it in the cold weather! I never get to wear it at home, so it was nice.

One night, I was about to get in the shower and I was closing the bathroom door to keep the hot air from getting out, and I scraped the door over the top of my left foot. I didn't know I knew so many words. I didn't say anything out loud, because there was no one there to hear my anguish, so I just scrunched my face and hissed through my teeth...I think I may have drooled a little. I knew it wasn't enough to need medical attention, so I just kind of stood there and tried to walk around the bathroom for a second until the pain subsided a little. I wanted to be mad at something or someone, but it was my own fault. I took a picture for you...this was the following night. (Please excuse the atrocity that is my toenail polish...or lack thereof.)

I took this one tonight. Stupid door.

Even though I was technically able to sleep well (comfy bed, no babies, etc), I did not. Mainly because of Snorey McSnorerson...also known as Loudest Phone Caller door. The first night was fine. The second night, I woke up to this rhythmic droning. I sat straight up in bed, listening all around, trying to figure out what in the world it was. I had my rain machine on (yes, I'm one of those people), so it was pretty loud droning. I finally figured out it was dude in the room next to me, snoring. He was INSANELY loud. I, thankfully, found some earplugs in my toiletry bag and was able to get a few more hours of sleep. The next night, not too bad, but the night after last night there...I woke up someone talking in my room. There was a security light right outside, so I could see pretty well even with the drawn curtains. Nobody was in the room. But, I could hear someone talking and it sounded like he was right beside me. Nope, it was Snorey talking on the phone. At 1 a.m. And he was loud. I turned the rain machine as loud as it could go (it's on my phone). I put my earplugs in. I put a pillow over my head. I unplugged the phone and put it on my head and then put the pillow over that. Nothing worked. I could still hear his incessant yapping. I figured if I'm going to be awake, I might as well know what he's chattering on and on about, so I took an earplug out and put an ear to the wall. Of course, he was speaking another language, why wouldn't he be. So, it was a conversation that was keeping me awake AND it was boring. I could also hear the guy he was talking to on speakerphone. I piled two pillows on my head and finally went back to sleep. Until something SO IMPORTANT happened in the world at 3 a.m. that demanded another phone call. And another at 5 a.m. I almost banged on the wall, but I was afraid he'd shoot me or punch through the wall or something, so I resigned myself to not sleeping that night.

Which was good, because at 5:30 a.m., I got a phone call from the airline saying my flight was cancelled due to plane maintenance...yippee. I called and was like, "Flight. Now." The lady found me a seat and I was annoyed because I was supposed to be home at 12 p.m., but was grateful that I was still going to be home at least sometime that day and thankful that I wasn't on the plane that needed the maintenance.

I was pretty crabby on Saturday. Thank goodness I was flying solo, because I might have eaten my traveling companion. I just wanted to get home. But, I like to people watch and airports provide great opportunities to do that, so, with that and my Gilmore Girl episodes, I made it through the day.

On my last flight from my layover city to home, I, of course, get stuck with a weirdo for a seat-mate. He walks to the back of the plane, eyes the seat numbers above my head, eyes the seat number on his boarding pass, looks around him, eyes the numbers again, and declares, "OH (insert expletive here)!!! Well, (insert another expletive here)!!!" I thought, "Well, I look that bad?" I asked, "Is this your seat?" pointing to my left. He surprisingly politely says, "Yeah, but there's no overhead compartment room for my bag near here." Good gracious alive, you're right! This is a DOWNRIGHT OUTRAGE!! Gyah...dramatic much, mister? He found a place for his precious bag and sat down. He minded his own business, but he hogged the window the whole time. It's not like I wanted to sit in his lap and look out, but a peek every now and then would have been nice. Also, I was right next to the bathroom. I mean, RIGHT next to it. If I turned to the right and blinked, my eyelashes scraped the bathroom door. So, you know you're in trouble when a fairly large guy lumbers down the aisle and heads in. Door latched. Occupied. He's in there for awhile and you know this is not a #1 situation. Sigh.

But, I made it home!!!!!!! And I hugged my man and my sweet baby girls so very tight. Ah, I missed them. I had a good trip, sans the snoring, and I'm glad we got a lot of good work done, but I was glad to be home. Today has been a very restful day. I haven't been so tired, mentally and physically, in a really long time. I had a pretty bad headache today, so David suggested I take a bath. Like, a BATH bath. I never take baths...I take showers. I haven't taken a bath bath in probably 5 years, no lie. I know I'll get a lot of grief for saying this, but taking a bath is like stewing in your own filth. BUT BUT BUT, don't hate me yet, I do understand and realize the therapeutic benefits that a relaxing, warm, lavender oil-infused bubble bath can have. And they worked their magic tonight. I got to read my David Weber book. Yes, I choose not to read books that make me a better person and intellectual. I want my brain to turn to mush.

So, I intended to have pictures and videos of the girls for you today (Mrs. Patti), but I will post them soon, along with some of my favorite SkyMall buys, part 2. Here, you can see part 1.

Dear Flight Attendants, a little advice, things you shouldn't say on an airplane...

1. "Ladies and gentleman, the pilot has informed me that we will be experiencing a good deal of turbulence during this flight, so please remain seated for the duration of the trip. If the airbags fall because of the rough ride, fasten them securely to your face. Welcome aboard!"

2. (to a passenger): "Your daughter needs to be above the seatbelt, not buckled in with you. That way, in case something happens and you're unconscious, we can just take her."


  1. So we just take her??

    Well isn't that reassuring! We flew once with our oldest but she sat in her own seat lol.

    Glad you had a good time, I would've definitely taken more cookies!

    btw my word verification is haribely.
    Like hairy belly.
    Maybe I'm the only one that finds that funny lol

  2. As usual you crack me up. Too bad I'm watching a roomful of fourth graders test or I would laugh out loud.

  3. " It was a cross between an Ewok and a Tribble" = win.


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