Wednesday, January 7, 2009

New Years' Tourists

So, I LOATHE going to tourist traps and doing tourist things. Yes, when you vacation or travel or whatever, you are a tourist...and I LOVE taking pictures and looking up at tall buildings and doing those types of tourist things, but I'm talking about tourist trap destinations....like Gatlinburg, Tennessee. If you live nearby, I'm sure you've been to it at some point during your life. Now, before I get cyberslapped, give me a second...I love Gatlinburg. I have since the first time I went with my family forever ago. I've been countless times...we used to go at least every two years. The Smoky Mountains are beautiful. I remember staying in some cute condo or cozy cottage or comfy cabin (I didn't plan for the alliteration, it just happened) and going hiking every single day...staying out until it got dark or until one of us passed out (I get my hiking dictatorship from my parents). We'd pack snacks and lunches and tons of water (except once...and we had to drink out of the creek...ahh, just kidding...we stole some other folks' water). After supper, the 'rents would take us downtown to Gatlinburg. We never stayed in town, so it was a treat to go down and see the lights and ride the sky lift (which now costs a whopping $11.22/person...which is RI-FLIPPING-DICULOUS). We'd always play laser tag and putt-putt and we'd always get a load of junk from Aunt Mahalia's....world's most magnificent maker of gourmet candies...and for some reason, I always wanted Runts...yeah, the stuff you can get at Wal-Mart --- for the ever-living LOVE OF IT, GET OFF ME, BLUE. Blue, the cat, will not get out of my face. Okay, she's gone. If you blow in her face long enough, she'll leave. --- Anyways...where was I...ah, yes...in town. And a few little goofy things like the Illusion Museum and Haunted House. There was also Ober Gatlinburg with the ice-skating and another, bigger sky lift than the stupid expensive one downtown and sky tram to take you up to the top.  So, Gatlinburg was a sweet, quaint, little mountain town until, one day...the king of tourism, King Tourist, threw up allll over Gatlinburg and alas, it is today what was left over after the incident. I'm just kidding, it's not that bad.

The Smokies are still beautiful and they really have cleaned up the town a lot and made it more family friendly (it was dumpy there for awhile). And most of the original stuff is still there. All I'm saying is, I'm not accustomed to going to the mountains and not hiking. I guess I could have said all of that in just that one sentence, but oh well. So, when we got a free trip to stay in Gatlinburg, it took every ounce of will power I have to not go hiking. But since we were there just for this past weekend, I knew we didn't have time to do everything. Our good friends, Zack and Malinda, came with us and I know I know I know not everybody likes to do outdoorsy stuff (no hippie comment from you, Malinda. I didn't make us go hiking, DID I?).

SO...for the first time ever, I was a hardcore tourist. And you know what, I had a BLAST! We stayed in town...we ate at all of the good restaurants...we played putt-putt...we went ice-skating...we went to Ober Gatlinburg on the sky tram...we rode the sky lift to the tippy top and it was just beautiful...we did a mirror maze (yes we're all 24 and older and it was so much fun!)...I ate my weight in candy from Aunt Mahalia's...it was alllllll good. Anyways. I have completely changed my views on being a tourist and yes, I really missed going hiking, but it was nice to just hang out in town.

I apologize for the lo-res pictures. I plum forgot my camera and I used my phone the whole time.

This is me and David riding the sky lift at Ober Gatlinburg. The boys got off at the Alpine slide and rode that down. Malinda and I joined up and rode to the very top.
This is inside Aunt Mahalia's...oh...so good. If you eat one pecan praline, it meets your recommended sugar allowance for 3 years.

These are some new Jelly Belly Flavors. I'm going to read them to you: Skunk Spray, Licorice, Rotten Egg, Buttered Popcorn, Ear Wax, Café Latte, Booger, Juicy Bear, Baby Wipes, Coconut, Pencil Shavings, looks like Tap Banana ??, Toothpaste, Berry Blue, Vomit, Peach, Moldy Cheese, Caramel Corn, Black Pepper, and Plum (Really, Jelly Belly? REALLY?)
This is me and Malinda ice-skating.

David and I ate at Hard Rock Café. I had the best ribs I've ever had...ever.

David and I walking downtown at night. It was mighty cold.

We played Adventure Quest putt-putt. Indoors and warm. This place has been there since...well, forever. I love it. You search for clues throughout the course and if you find them all, you win a prize. Used to, the prize was a free ticket to the Illusion Museum...this time, it was a Mardis Gras necklace. REALLY, ADVENTURE QUEST? REALLY? I was beyond disappointed. I still took it. I mean, we won it fair and square.

3 comments:

  1. Let me say, a couple of years ago, we ate the Bertie Bott jelly beans as a dare on a camp team. The vomit really tastes like you threw up in your mouth. Earwax is the worst.

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  2. That last picture made David look like Frodo in LOTR... like that thing is one of those bad horse guys and is about to lop his head off...Glad ya'll had fun!

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  3. You never mentioned anything to me about wanting to go hiking...you could have gone without me, it wouldn't have hurt my feelings or anything :( I'm sorry I didn't know how important it is to you...I even told Zack to get off your back about those shoes you wanted...

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