What Would You Do If...

So, the girls wanted to write a post and I'm like, "Seriously...your eyes aren't even opened...that's just ridiculous." And they were like, "Seriously...let us do it or we can make this miserable for you." And I'm a little scared of them...especially together...they're masterminds. So, here is a questionnaire that Piper Lee and Harper have filled out for you...

What Would You Do If...

You got a visit from your favorite celebrity:

Seeing as how our favorite celebrity is Tom Colicchio, we'd say to him, "Tom...cutie patootie Tom...listen, we'd like some food...get to work."

You won 500 million dollars:

Well, after we paid around 40% for taxes, we would buy a guest house for Tom Colicchio, buy TV (like, all of it) so we could control what shows were aired and make the dumb ones go away, buy Chick-fil-A...and invest the rest.

You found a wallet on the ground:

Shopping!

Your date throws up on you:

Jerk, this is a new sweater...throw back up on him.

You witnessed a murder:

We'd call Dr. Temperance Brennan at the Jeffersonian to see what she would do.

You were stranded on an island with nothing but the ability to make one phone call:

Call Mom and Dad to send us some Banana Boat Tanning Oil...4...well, maybe 8.

Facebook and Myspace both shut down:

Who cares about MySpace...Facebook, impossible to shut down. Robots control it.

A random dude offered you candy:

Say, "What? What is this cheap stuff? It's not even real chocolate...it's 'chocolate-flavored'. Laaaaaaame. Go home, cheapo."

You lost your favorite thing in the world:

Well, since our favorite thing right now is the warm, dark recesses of Mom's internal organs...we'd say in a few months, we're gonna be pah-retty upset at everybody.

You got invited to be on a reality TV show:

We'd say, "We don't get out of bed for less than $100,000 a day. Eat that, producers."

You caught a friend stealing from you:

Slap her. And then hug her, because everybody makes mistakes. But then slowly phase her out.

Someone shaved off your eyebrows:

We have like 5 hairs on our eyebrows right now...you think we're concerned with that.

You got a phone call from the President:

We'd say, "Sup...you have a nice smile. Now go read this article that Brandi posted yesterday."

You had one wish:

Wish for more wishes...and don't say we can't do that. The last genie that told us that ended up being buried with his lamp in the back yard.